I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
