I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
