good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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