# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
