WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
