The maid of honor just puked.
I can text with my tongue
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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