I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
