i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
