So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize
