STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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