he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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