It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
