is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
