I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
