I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
