Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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