do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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