hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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