we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize