Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
