i think i have two assholes
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I'm too high and old for this...
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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