btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
