Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
