Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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