return my video game
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
