I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
