drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
