i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
