Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Just pee around me
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Randomize
