My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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