just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
