If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
