just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
