Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
