worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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