what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
