No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
