I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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