Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
