omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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