Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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