I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Randomize
