PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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