used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
