Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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