You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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