Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
