The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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