Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
