Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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