I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I am never drinking with the goths again.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
